The Lost Art of Wooing

Woo : to seek the affections of,with the objective of marriage

I have been thinking about this for a while - the Singleton Syndrome - which has now begun to emcompass men.

All my single male friends (barring 1-2 exceptions) seem singularly incapable of finding a girlfriend!

And they're all fairly nice people - no multiple piercings,black nail polish or multi-colored mohawks, but no girlfriends either.

Forget the traditional wooing, guys these days can't seem to start a conversation about the weather with a girl not known to them!

So what is the problem?

Are these guys all super-shy? No.

Are they Quasimodo look-alikes? No.

Are they sociopaths/psychopaths/criminals? No. (well...at this point,no)

Are they dumb(literally and figuratively)? No.

So why are they terrified of introducing themselves to women?

Even the pack-mentality does not seem to bolster their confidence anymore.

All a bunch of guys will do is stare,ogle and lech at a group of girls and both groups, usually, end up eye-balling each other.

Point to note : while the boys are all knees and elbows, the girls, in most cases, couldn't be bothered trying to make things easy for guys who can't even walk up to them and say Hello!

Whatever the reason for this social ineptitude,my advice to my guy friends is :
(I have had 3 requests to 'help me find a girl,plzz plzz plzz' )

1. Assess yourself (and be honest about it!)

If you genuinely are Greek-god gorgeous,you probably are seeing a very attractive woman
and hence shdn't be reading this at all.

But if women don't exactly fall over themselves for you, accept that(it can be tough!)

So if looks are ruled out, check the rest :

physique - will def bolster confidence (obsessing over it can sink you big-time!)
intelligence - either you have it or you don't
wit - either you have it or you don't
humor - either you have it or you don't
talent - either you have it or you don't, but there must something you do well!
charisma - either you have it or you don't
personality - either you have it or you don't

So work with what you have, work on what you'd like to improve on and don't expect instant results.

I mean if you are skinny ,you can't expect to get bulging biceps overnight or if you have the personality of gym socks, well , you can't turn into a female-magnet overnight.

Physique is simple to tackle, charisma is slightly tough and personality can be developed when you work on everything in between and then add some confidence to it!

That apart, just be yourself!

No guy ever believes that and I don't understand it!

Honestly,guys! Women like men who are comfortable with themselves - qualities and vices.

Nothing is a bigger turn-off than a guy trying to be something that he is not.

Be honest and laugh at yourself once in while - it's not going to kill you!
(with all due consideration,honesty just might!)

Seriously,you can't expect to get away with telling a woman she has a nice smile while talking to her breasts!

So once you're comfortable in your skin and all that,you have to make the effort of going out and meeting new people, how you do it is upto you.

As long as you break out of the comfort circle of buddies,who have seen you drunk , puking,squealing at the sight of a rat and what-not - you're on the right track!

You need to be open to meeting friends' friends,accepting introductions from acquaintances and lesser-known people.

During this process,you'll hone your social skills and hey,you might just meet that special someone!

And an important thing you'll realize is that you're not alone - there are other people like you,fumbling and bumbling around!

Now once you're on the social circuit, do all you can to make the woman you fancy remember you the next day - it could be for your ability to laugh at yourself or your genuine good humor,or your absent-mindedness or the fact that you were really desperate or obnoxious or both!!

If you nail that,you've hit paydirt!

Remember all's fair in love and war!